People from flatter lands sometimes wonder why us native hill folk talk the way we do. So, at the risk of stepping on Mitch Jayne's' cake, I'll take a whack at explaining.

Our language peculiarities are not so much in the words we use as in the way we use them. Or in the way we pronounce them, which amounts to much the same thing. For any who may be slightly interested, here's a brief glossary of Ozarkese:

AGAIN: Some time in the future. "I can't take it right now; I'll get it again I come over this way."

BAIT: Large amount or quantity. "He et a whole bait of fried green tomaters."

FAR: Conflagration. "They was a big far that burned down the courthouse."

FORCED: Large group of trees. "We went deer hunting over in Mark Twain National Forced."

HARD: Employed. "I hard the neighbor boy to help me fix fence." Also, a man's name: "Hard Cossell used to be a sportscaster for ABC."

IDA: Would have. "Ida had a better time if Ida stayed home." Can be a woman's name, too: "Ida Fern tuck it home and put it in her chester drawers."

LIKE TO HAVE: Nearly or almost. "My foot slipped on a rock and I like to have fell in the creek."

PASSEL: Large number. "They had a whole passel of kids."

RULE: Not urban. "Farmers live in the rule area."

STUDY: Think or ponder. "I'll have to study whether I can afford that bull."

TAKES AFTER: Resembles. "He takes after his Pa quite a bit."

WORK BRITTLE: Ambitious. "He's a lot more work brittle than his brother."

That's enough to get you started. To be authentic, Ozarkese should be spoken high in the nasal passages and may be more genuine if enunciated across a lipful of snuff. (I know, it's politically incorrect these days to suggest the use of tobacco in any form).

But keep practicing. You'll get the hang of it d'reckly.