COUNTRY HUMOR
'Justice' for dummies
By Jack S. Bray
Back when he was nominated to the U.S. Supreme Court, Justice Antonin Scalia wrote: "We live in an age of hair-trigger unconstitutionality."
Our basic democratic process, Justice Scalia said, is under attack as a violation of basic constitutional rights. Constant running to the courts to save us from simple democracy is a hallmark of our time. In fact, activists with various axes to grind now spend less time lobbying legislatures than they spend in court.
Our legal system is broken. One result of a sea of litigation is a judiciary with vastly increased power in relation to Congress and state legislatures. Another result is legislatures and bureaucracies that tend to fuzzy-up laws with vague terms: Good faith, fairness, equitableness and other cushiony terms almost guarantee that a law or rule will wind up in court.
For another thing, the United States is being transformed from a community of friends and neighbors into a nation of self-serving potential litigants. Tort records are full of cases where juries rewarded utter morons for their careless--and sometimesillegal--behavior. More and more, we are succumbing to what might be called the "Stella" syndrome.
You may recall the case of Stella Liebeck, who spilled hot coffee on herself and sued McDonald's. Liebeck picked up a cup of coffee at a McDonald's drive-through window, put the cup of hot liquid in her lap and drove away. When the coffee splashed out and scalded her legs, Liebeck found herself a sharp, hungry lawyer and sued the fast-food company--and won a big settlement.
Or, take Jerry Williams of Little Rock, who was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his neighbor's beagle. The dog was on a chain in its owner's fenced-in yard. The award was less than it might have been because the jury felt the dog may have been somewhat provoked. Williams had repeatedly shot the beagle with a pellet gun.
Or how about the Oklahoma man who bought a new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On his first trip in the rig, the man pulled onto the interstate, set the cruise control at 70 mph and left the driver's seat to go back to the galley and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the Winnie ran off the highway and overturned. The owner sued Winnebago for not advising him in the owner's manual that he shouldn't do this. An Oklahoma jury awarded him $1,750,000.
Certainly, people with genuine injuries and legitimate claims should be able to seek redress through the judicial system. Citizens and organizations should be able to bring legal challenges to laws and rules they believe to be unfair or ill-drafted.
But where does this kind of thing stop? Maybe we need to change the rules in the lawsuit game.
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